{"id":13443,"date":"2022-11-21T19:44:53","date_gmt":"2022-11-21T18:44:53","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.podivinsky.cz\/?p=13443"},"modified":"2022-11-21T19:45:01","modified_gmt":"2022-11-21T18:45:01","slug":"humor-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.podivinsky.cz\/?p=13443","title":{"rendered":"HUMOR!"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>&#8222;&#8220;Rakousk\u00fd humor:&#8220;&#8220;&#8220;<br>Rozd\u00edl mezi rokem 1942 a 2022 je, \u017ee N\u011bmci nemus\u00ed a\u017e do Stalingradu, aby<br>zmrzli.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>V\u00fdchodoevropsk\u00fd humor:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Je lep\u0161\u00ed, kdy\u017e Rusov\u00e9 zav\u0159ou plyn, ne\u017e kdy\u017e ho N\u011bmci pust\u00ed\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u010cesk\u00fd humor :<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Man\u017eel p\u0159inese man\u017eelce do kuchyn\u011b zaj\u00edce kter\u00e9ho chytil venku a mlsn\u011b se<br>olizuje: \u201eUd\u011blej ho na smetan\u011b!\u201c<br>Man\u017eelka : \u201eNejde plyn.\u201c On : \u201eTak ho upe\u010d!\u201c Ona : \u201eNejde ani<br>elekt\u0159ina.\u201c Man\u017eel se na\u0161tve a mrskne u\u0161\u00e1ka zp\u011bt za plot.<br>Ten se oklepe a za\u0159ve: \u201eSl\u00e1va Ukrajin\u011b!\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Slovensk\u00fd humor : De\u017eo se v zime zobud\u00ed a v byte je pekne teplo. Chyt\u00ed<br>radi\u00e1tor \u2013 je hor\u00faci. Pust\u00ed vodu \u2013 te\u010die aj tepl\u00e1. Pust\u00ed plyn \u2013 plyn ide.<br>Rozru\u0161en\u00fd De\u017eo kri\u010d\u00ed: \u201eAranka, vst\u00e1vaj! Komunisti sa vr\u00e1tili!\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>P\u0159ed t\u0159iceti lety jsme se ptali, jak dohnat \u017eivotn\u00ed \u00farove\u0148 z\u00e1padu, a dneska<br>se pt\u00e1me, jak se vr\u00e1tit k \u017eivotn\u00ed \u00farovni p\u0159ed t\u0159iceti lety.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8222;<br>Nerozum\u00edm, pro\u010d n\u00e1m p\u0159\u00e1tel\u00e9 prod\u00e1vaj\u00ed plyn a ropu dr\u00e1\u017e ne\u017e nep\u0159\u00e1tel\u00e9.<br>&#8222;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8222;<br>Podle faktury na elekt\u0159inu m\u00e1m doma urychlova\u010d \u010d\u00e1stic, podle faktury za plyn<br>bydl\u00edm na Alja\u0161ce, podle faktury za vodu m\u00e1m koupali\u0161t\u011b a podle platu<br>pob\u00edr\u00e1m podporu v nezam\u011bstnanosti.<br>&#8222;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8222;<br>Ceny mouky a strouhanky se vy\u0161plhaly tak vysoko, \u017ee v\u00fdrobci p\u0159em\u00fd\u0161l\u00ed, \u017ee by<br>do p\u00e1rk\u016f op\u011bt d\u00e1vali maso.<br>&#8222;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8222;<br>Loni touto dobou n\u00e1m nakazovali sprchovat se po ka\u017ed\u00e9 cest\u011b ven, dnes n\u00e1m<br>sprchov\u00e1n\u00ed zakazuj\u00ed.<br>&#8222;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8222;<br>P\u0159ed rokem jsem se m\u011b\u0159ila, zda nem\u00e1m moc vysokou teplotu t\u011bla, dnes m\u011b\u0159\u00edm,<br>zda nem\u00e1m moc vysokou teplotu v pokoji.<br>&#8222;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8222;<br>Loni jsem bez rou\u0161ky nemohla zazvonit u soused\u016f a dnes se m\u00e1m se sousedkou<br>koupat v jedn\u00e9 koupeln\u011b a p\u00e9ct ku\u0159e v jedn\u00e9 troub\u011b.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&#8222;&#8220;Rakousk\u00fd humor:&#8220;&#8220;&#8220;Rozd\u00edl mezi rokem 1942 a 2022 je, \u017ee N\u011bmci nemus\u00ed a\u017e do Stalingradu, abyzmrzli. V\u00fdchodoevropsk\u00fd humor: Je lep\u0161\u00ed, kdy\u017e Rusov\u00e9 zav\u0159ou plyn, ne\u017e kdy\u017e ho N\u011bmci pust\u00ed\u2026 \u010cesk\u00fd humor : Man\u017eel p\u0159inese man\u017eelce do kuchyn\u011b zaj\u00edce kter\u00e9ho chytil venku a mlsn\u011b seolizuje: \u201eUd\u011blej ho na smetan\u011b!\u201cMan\u017eelka : \u201eNejde plyn.\u201c On : \u201eTak ho upe\u010d!\u201c &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/www.podivinsky.cz\/?p=13443\" class=\"more-link\">Pokra\u010dov\u00e1n\u00ed textu <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">HUMOR!<\/span> <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-13443","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-zaliby"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.podivinsky.cz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13443","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.podivinsky.cz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.podivinsky.cz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.podivinsky.cz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.podivinsky.cz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=13443"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.podivinsky.cz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13443\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":13444,"href":"https:\/\/www.podivinsky.cz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13443\/revisions\/13444"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.podivinsky.cz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=13443"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.podivinsky.cz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=13443"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.podivinsky.cz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=13443"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}